i wrote a poem for the first time in many months and it makes me sad. i can't decide if it's pretty good or really sucky. i'll let you guys be the judge. here goes nothing...

love's dark flame
grew over two
dancing silouhettes
in the shadows grew
flesh covered bodies
joined in one
as they watched together,
the setting sun.
kisses and giggles
as the house grew still
desire was building
as they took their fill
touching and touching
her heart skipped a beat,
but she was empty inside
dead with defeat.
their love pressed on
while she was in pain
and then she felt sick
and she was to blame.
the attraction was dead
for herself, she knew
she was ugly naked,
had to lose a few.
and the boy was solemn as
she put on her clothes,
praying to God
that nobody knows
she was dying inside,
starving for life
fighting and fighting
what she chose to hide.
months pressed on as
she wasted away
and the boy ran out
of nice things to say
and she felt alone as
her face went pale,
breathless on the floor with
her body so frail.
those dreams of beauty,
diamonds, and gold,
shattered like glass
the second she told
herself she was worthless,
ugly, and obese,
and that she deserved
to become deceased.
so she made some slashes and
took some pills,
and figured her body
would become fulfilled.
her seventy pounds
trembled on the floor,
but soon enough there
was a knock on her door
...
silence screamed
as he saw her pain and
her held her tight and
he took the blame
as he watched her lay
nestled in his lap,
and he yelled to God
"How'd she fall into this trap?
She was amazing,
with such beautiful eyes,
i love her so much!
SHE SHOULDN'T FUCKING DIE!
..She makes me so happy,
I'll just die without her,
please give me my baby!
HELP,..LORD,..SIR!"
...
but people come
and people go
and in God's heart,
he did know
that he had to take her
away from her hell,
and give her the heaven
we all know so well.
...
so now a month later
with tears down his face,
he puts some red roses
next to her grave.
while his life presses on,
he still feels bad
and he cries alone;
he lost all he had.
and he remembers
as he leaves her a card
and thinks of the days when
life wasn't so hard.
but his shadow then formed
as he walked away
and he weeped alone
for her sixteenth birthday.