i have given in and i have returned to my old guestbook. this makes me sad. my new one just didn't work at all, and i have no clue what's wrong with it. you guys should sign it and leave me HAPPY messages only, please. thank you.

sometimes i just want to start over. go back in time. this is worthless. today, is worthless. yesterday was worthless. all i did yesterday was just lie around and i did nothing. not once did i get out of the house. not once did anyone come visit me. not once did i do anything at all of importance. i hate those days. i hate being alone, i hate being bored, i hate feeling sad. i missed my boy a lot...he had to work all day long. it was depressing. today i am supposed to get him all to myself. hoo-rah.

today should be different. today i should become beautiful. today i should feel like a million dollars because i have been looking foward to today for over 3 years. the reason is petty enough,...i'm getting my braces off. but when you are already seventeen years old, stupid things like braces can make you feel so sad. so ugly. so hideous. i just want to not feel so stupid anymore. i don't want to be mediocre anymore. to many people it may not matter at all, but to me it's quite the big deal. this is my one step closer to physical perfection. now if only i could lose about 20 more pounds?

this is lame. my excuses for writing are lame. i, miranda, am lame. these words are worthless. they're nothing. i feel like i could ramble on and on and on for 100 years and nothing i would ever say would have importance. everything would just be a drag. sometimes i feel so empty. i am happy, of course. but i can just get so down sometimes. i think i just need to get out. i've been in my house for too long. i need a reason to breathe. i need to see my lover, i need to kiss him, and hold him. i love him so much. honestly.