i have no friends. it's depressing, really.

i am always left out because i am always too busy.

take friday night for example; i came home from the football game and there was a party across the street from my house. and a car full of drunk girls were parked in my driveway. i honked at them and they flipped me off. i seriously wanted to kill them ALL. literally. i got so uptight and stressed out. practically my whole school was there, and i was so set on just HAVING to go to sleep. i begged my dad to call the cops. i'm so uptight, SO not understanding. i went to bed.

my boyfriend likes to go out and have fun with his friends and i get jealous. i have NO time for fun.

saturday morning i had to get up at 6:30 am and go take SATs. NO FUN. good lord. it wasn't hard in the least, though. afterwards i was on my way home and i saw hollie driving with jen, kristin, and toni. i got so jealous. jen called me and said they were coming home from olive garden. god, i wish so bad that i had time for people to include me.

last night i went to cisco's house and we just sat around and did nothing. boring times.

and today, i got up early to go to church with brent but i ended up not going because i was afraid. he's going to be mad at me and i feel awful. i have to lie to him so that it will be okay. i'm such a shitty person sometimes.

today i have to go dance at an open house for my new job, and then do a raffle ticket sale for project grad. i'll get to see cisco for a little while later on tonight, but until then, everything is just so frustrating.

i hate school, and i hate being a senior. it's so fucking stressful. i cannot wait to just graduate and be done.

oh shit, i just forgot that i have to memorize 14 lines of macbeth for english tomorrow. stab me with a fucking spoon, PLEASE.

oh and, lauren dublah is down from college this weekend but hmm, i won't get to see her. what's new?